by Chrysa Smith

You’ve got the remote in hand. You’re ready for your favorite sitcom, drama or reality show.

Then, sure enough, you’ve flicked a bit too far—far enough to catch a tiny bit of the 24 hours of bad news always readily available to ruin your day. If it’s not terrorism, it’s the oil spill, the volcanic cloud, new causes for bad illnesses, earthquakes, economic downfalls, corporate corruption, out-of-control government spending. And then, just when you reach for the remedy, they tell you today that more than one to two glasses of wine per week is bad for your health.

OMG!!! When will it end?

I propose a 24 hour good news channel, and I’ve got just the headlines I’d like to see kick it off:

Study shows Rubenesque Women make Better Lovers

Chocolate Shown to Lengthen life, Reduce Wrinkles and Increase Pheromone Production

Red Wine Consumption Linked to High IQ Scores and Longevity Levels

Beach Houses Improve Marital Relationships

Until the network gets up and operating, turn off the tv and turn on your favorite music or partner and let the world pass you by for just a little while. I find that for every three bits of bad news I get, I need to seek out at least one good life story.

How do you escape the continuous flow of bad news on the air, in the papers? Suggestions must be ‘postmarked’ by December 31, 2011–ie; before the end of the world in 2012, as predicted by ancient Mayans.