Giving the President a Finger

By: Mary Fran Bontempo

To hear an audio version of this post, click the play arrow below.



Photo by Haraz N. Ghanbari for the Associated Press

 I’ve used the same gesture countless times to bring errant kids (or a husband) in line.

But on the President of the United States?

Last week, in a photo shot by Haraz N. Ghanbari for the Associated Press, Arizona’s Republican Governor, Jan Brewer, was caught wagging a finger directly into the face of the commander-in-chief. Seems the governor had a few issues with the President and sought to drive home her point with her pointer finger.

To be fair, there is another single-digit gesture Governor Brewer could have employed to catch the President’s attention. But that one would have likely had her being tackled to the tarmac by the Secret Service.

Still, it seems Brewer crossed a line.

Finger wagging is but one of many gestures, expressions, exasperated sighs and so on in the “scolding” arsenal of women and mothers around the world. We frequently use them in conjunction with words, but often times, a silent admonition in the form of a raised eyebrow, a tilt of the head or a quickly raised palm can be just as effective.

Think about how often your own mother quieted you with a quick swivel of her head followed by an arched brow. How many times did a deep intake of breath followed by an equally long sigh provide fair warning that you were treading on thin ice and should “knock it off” though your mother hadn’t uttered a single syllable?

There’s no doubt the plethora of non-verbal communication routinely utilized by women is effective. But it’s also highly personal and more than a little intimate.

Once, during a light-hearted “discussion” with one of my husband’s friends, I jokingly wagged my finger in his face to underscore a point. “Hey, hold on,” he said. “The only woman allowed to do that to me has stayed married to me for thirty-two years.”

He had a point—no pun intended. When we women employ our gestures, arched brows and sighs, we are performing the human equivalent of the action a mother bear takes to scold her cubs. It’s a less physical form of mama bear cuffing the offending youngster with a backhand, or backpaw, and knocking the cub off its feet. It’s a non-verbal way of saying, “Hey, dummy! Wake up and pay attention! I’m telling you this for your own good!”

And it’s also not something you do to strangers, or acquaintances…or the President of the United States.

For his part, Obama handled the incident gracefully, noting that he felt the entire episode was blown out of proportion.

That’s a good thing for Governor Brewer. Because if Obama had responded with a single-digit waving gesture of his own, I’ll bet the Secret Service would have simply looked the other way.

What's in your arsenal of gestures? Click "comments" below and share!

Article first published as Giving the President a Finger on Technorati.

Laughing @ Middle Age, a Groundhog Cartoon by Pat Achilles

Send this chuckle to a friend by forwarding our link: www.notreadyforgrannypanties.com .

Safety with Master Vince Melchiorre--A Video for You!

Safety first! Learn from the safety tips below as Master Vince Melchiorre (who also happens to be my cousin!) demonstrates some ways women can protect themselves from attackers.

Many thanks to Gina Rubel and Furia Rubel Communications for hosting this event!

--Mary Fran

Picture of the Week by Carmen Ferreiro Esteban

Hugo

 directed by Martin Scorsesse

based on the book THE INVENTION OF HUGO CABRET by Brian Selznik

reviewed by Carmen Ferreiro-Esteban

Because my YA fantasy Two Moon Princess was published in 2007 the same year Brian Selznik’s THE INVENTION OF HUGO CABRET came out and the ALA (American Library Association) annual conference was in Philadelphia in January 2008, I was there when they announced THE INVENTION OF HUGO CABRET had won the Caldecott Award, the most prestigious award in Children Literature. 

Although mainly unknown then by readers, judging by their reaction, it was clearly a favorite among the librarians present at the conference. 

Now four years later THE INVENTION OF HUGO CABRET was made into a spectacular 3D movie by Martin Scorsese, the director that gave us Taxi Driver, Raging Bull, Gangs of New York, and the TV show Boardwalk Empire among many others.

Hugo, the movie, is cinematographically a stunning achievement. The settings are gorgeous, from the amazingly detailed recreation of a train station in the 1930s to the streets of Paris, from the world behind the walls and the workings of the clocks to the silent movies stages. 

Yes the movie is visually gorgeous, but I found the story itself seriously lacking. 

THE INVENTION OF HUGO CABRET was a different kind of book. It was told both in images and in words. But it’s not a picture book, nor a graphic novels. The first 46 pages are drawings and the drawings tell the story.

A story its author introduces as follows: Paris in the 1930's, a thief, a broken machine, a strange girl, a mean old man, and the secrets that tie them all together... Welcome to The Invention of Hugo Cabret.
Whether the story works better in the book I do not know for I haven’t read it. But in the movie the plot seems far-fetched, an excuse to pay an homage to a time long gone when movies where so new, people ran screaming from the theater when shown a train entering the station. 

Despite his cuteness, I found difficult to believe a young boy could keep the clocks of the station running while keeping his existence a secret, or that the old toymaker in the store was related to the automaton his father rescued from the museum. 

And the life in the train station was, although so perfectly recreated, cliche and kind of predictable. 

But I am in the minority here: Hugo has won 11 Oscar nominations. Which means, many people love it.

And in Rotten Tomatoes, most critic praises it. Except for Wall Street Journal critic JOE MORGENSTERN who writes “Yet thematic potency and cinematic virtuosity (...) can't conceal a deadly inertness at the film's core.”

Sadly, I agree with him.

Click below to watch Hugo's trailer.

The Queen's Controversy

by Chrysa Smith

Paula Deen, the 'Queen' of southern cooking, is now under fire. 'Hiding' her Diabetic diagnosis for three years has now led to criticism: and that is, that she waited until her partnership with a major drug company to tell the world.

Y'all know that Paula's middle name comes in a yellow stick in the dairy section. She was criticized for that (not in my circle), and now, scrutinized for waiting until she had a big 'deal' before turning over her fork to a healthier and what is seen as 'wealthier' routine and 'selling out' as a spokesperson for a new Diabetes drug from drug giant, Novo Nordisk.

Of course, criticism has come from Anthony Bourdain; the author of Kitchen Confidential and a series of other 'tell all' books about life in the kitchen. Bourdain tends to 'rat' out chefs for what he sees as their ineptness, their lack of authenticity, their dirty little kitchen secrets and personality quirks that are kept from public review. But it has been reported that Deen's PR person has quit over the new venture, which makes you wonder if the criticism doesn't run deeper

But what do y'all think? Is Deen doing anything different than anyone in her position? Can you blame her for following the obvious connection to convert her cooking and become the new face of healthy living? Doesn't the celebrity world constantly jump into new ventures that are advantageous to them? And is there really something wrong with the whole thing? CAN ANYONE HAVE ANY PERSONAL PRIVACY ANYMORE?

Personally, I'd welcome the thought of being 'discovered', showered with money-making offers, tv shows, public appearances, product endorsements and a world of glamour. Well maybe, for at least a few months or so. When someone succeeds, unless they are ripping someone off or doing it at someone's detriment, it seems to me that the old 'green eyed monster' reappears. It's the same old chestnut. Ever since Eve buttered her fig leaf and served it to Adam al fresco in a garden.

Meticulously Martha

by Chrysa Smith


There she was. Entering 'stage left' as they say in the 'biz.' The blond emperess who can do just about anything 'better than', well, just about any of us. And I was there to witness it all in the flesh.


Yes, I was lucky enough to score 'Martha' tickets to her soon-to-be-cancelled show. And I must say, while I've been strongly attracted to her sense of style and home fashion, I've never sat and thought too much about Martha--the person.


Sure enough, I've heard the stories---how impossibly demanding she is to work with, live with. How perfection may not even be enough for her. But I have to say, the woman is damn impressive.


There she stood, rambling off tips for stain removal, cooking Butternut Squash perfectly, and answering audience questions about gardening, her 'live' greenhouse and what type of salt to use for what purpose. She had all the answers, including telling us how she has a board full of ramekins filled with various salts to use in cooking. I think it was over a dozen.


Just how does the decorating diva do it? First of all, I couldn't stay awake enough hours to keep up with the demands of her mind. She pushes, pushes, pushes the limits of 'more.' She's very attractive to boot. Having been a model, she joyfully (at least for those of us with middle-aged bulge) has a little extra skin around the middle, but is strikingly pretty. She has emerged bigger and better than ever; having overcome something as mortifying as 'prison' on a publicity scale that is probably equal to Al Capone. All of this, plus as one door is closing on her show, another door is opening for her in retail.


In addition to her lines at KMart and Macy's, Martha is now partnering with JC Penney to reinvent their image. I believe she said this would all occur by the end of the year.


Now that I'm writing, I suppose she is an incredible lesson in 'perseverence.' All of the greats are. Despite the circumstances at any time, she's able to rise above, keep a 'stiff upper lip' and move onward and upward. And that's a great lesson for all of us---to be meticulously moving on.

A Powerful Cover-Up--Super Cosmetics

By: Mary Fran Bontempo

To hear an audio version of this column, click the play arrow below.

I thought I was finished with graduations.

Yes, I still have kids in school, but personally, my last graduation took place quite a while ago, after an intense four years of college. Like graduation from elementary and high school, that one was a passage into a new, exciting world full of promise and potential.

But recently, I received another “diploma,” entirely unanticipated and frankly, unwelcome. It appears that I have “graduated” into the world of industrial strength cosmetics.

Americans are big on power. Power is good and more power is better. Strong? Okay. Extra strength? Well of course we want extra strength. Move onto industrial strength and you’ve achieved the ultimate in power.

All of which is fine with me if we’re talking about something to take the soap scum off of my shower. But industrial strength on my face?

Last week, as I walked through a department store, I stopped at a cosmetics counter. Within seconds, the sales clerk honed in.

“Can I help you?”

“I’m not sure. I don’t wear much makeup, but I was thinking I might need something to cover up these dark circles under my eyes. Do you have any suggestions?”

The woman looked at me (I’m not sure, but I think she winced) and made a beeline across the floor.

“I have just the thing. It’s an industrial strength concealer. It hides everything—circles, blemishes, discoloration, broken capillaries, redness—everything. It lasts all day. And it won’t settle into fine lines and wrinkles. You can put it all over your face. This is exactly what you need,” she chirped.

Ouch. Discoloration? Broken capillaries? Redness? I thought I needed a little help, but an industrial strength product slathered all over my face? Seems like it was only yesterday that a touch of mascara and a swipe of lip gloss did the trick. Suddenly I’ve moved on to products that require application with a trowel.

I didn’t even know cosmetics came in industrial strength. But if this is the trend, I’m guessing that next time I need makeup they’ll send me across the street to Home Depot.

“I’m sorry Ma’am, but you’re too far gone for even the industrial strength concealer. If you head over to aisle seven at the Home Depot you’ll find spackle to fill in those crevices. Next row over has the primers and you can top it all of with the heavy duty latex indoor/outdoor paint in aisle nine.”

After the sales clerk delivered her verbal smack down, I plunked twenty bucks on the counter and pocketed a tiny, circular pod of super-potent facial cover up. I suppose I shouldn’t feel too badly. It seems I’m hardly the only one in need of the product; the accompanying literature was printed in nine languages.

Guess what? The stuff actually works. I slopped it on and watched my flaws disappear, but I think I got a little carried away. Before I realized it, I was scraping the last of it from the container with my fingernail.

Hmmm. Perhaps an industrial strength concealer should come in an industrial sized vat. Maybe I'll find it when I graduate to buying my cosmetics at Home Depot.

What’s your take on cosmetics with super-powers? Click “comments” below and share!

Laughing @ Middle Age, a Car Cartoon by Pat Achilles

Send this chuckle to a friend by forwarding our link: www.notreadyforgrannypanties.com.

The Bark Side: Superbowl Commercial Preview--A Video For You!

It's almost here--Superbowl Commercial Time! This hilarious commercial takes a moment to sink in, but if you listen carefully, you'll want to take out your light saber and do battle with Darth Vader! Check out the costumes on these adorable pooches

and may The Force be with you!

--Mary Fran