Just for a giggle, ladies.  (Even though we all know it’s all true!)
The Hormone Guide
Women will understand this!
Men should memorize it!

Every woman knows that there are days when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands. This is a handy guide that should be carried like a driver’s license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!

DANGEROUS                      SAFER                           SAFEST                          ULTRA SAFE

What’s for dinner?                  Can I help you                 Where would you              Here, have some wine.
                                               with dinner?                     like to go for dinner?

     

Are you                                  You sure look                 WOW!  Look at you!        Here, have some wine. 
wearing that?                           good in brown!

What are you                          Could we be                    Here’s my paycheck.         Here, have some wine.
so worked up about?              overreacting?

Should you be                          You know, there             Can I get you a                 Here, have some wine.
eating that?                               are a lot of                       piece of chocolate
                                                apples left.                       with that?

What did you                            I hope you                       I’ve always loved             Here, have some wine.
DO all day?                              didn’t overdo                   you in that robe!
                                                 it today.

13 Things PMS Stands For
1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5.. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweatpants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff
and my favorite one:
13. Potential Murder Suspect
Forward this information to all of your friends and those who might need a good laugh…
and men who need a warning.
And, have some wine.