By: Mary Fran Bontempo

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knivesSooooo…..I can’t bring my shampoo, but I can bring my pocket knife.

The Transportation Security Administration last week introduced new rules, due to be implemented April 25th, relaxing restrictions on carry-on items allowed on planes.

When I heard restrictions were easing a bit, my first thought was, “Thank God, now I don’t have to tear through the house digging out tiny bottles to put my shampoo in anymore. And I can finally bring a full size tube of toothpaste. Plus my perfume! And no more zip-lock bags.

Then again, that would make sense.

Instead, the TSA had announced that although I’ll still have to go crazy trying to pack my hair products, I can waltz on board with my pocket knife and its pointy, sharp blade.

What could possibly be wrong with that?

If by chance I forget my knife, though, I’ll be able to get on the plane with my hockey and lacrosse sticks, along with my pool cue, ski poles and golf clubs.

What could go wrong?

No one could use and of those things as weapons, could they?

Have you ever seen a hockey or lacrosse game? They’re legal excuses for men to beat the hell out of each other with sticks.

By the way, the picture above? Taken from the TSA’s site of soon to be permitted carry-on items. You wouldn’t feel threatened if someone sat next to you on a plane with any of that stuff, would you?

Look, I get that transportation safety is a tough job. No matter the scrutiny, we’ll never insure that something horrifying doesn’t happen again.

But do we have to make it easier?

And do we have to make it so hard to wash our hair?

Logic has never been a governmental strong suit, no matter who’s in power. But this is just plain stupid.

Nobody needs to carry a knife of any kind on a plane. Pool cues and hockey sticks? Don’t see much need for them either.

But we women and our cosmetics are a different story. Every time I have to check a bag with my personal care items inside, I have a mini panic attack. What if the airline loses my cosmetics? Have you seen me in the morning? I NEED MY PRODUCTS!

I hope the powers that be think better of this. And if they don’t, I hope they’ll at least let me board with all of my cosmetics. I promise I’ll leave my pocket knife at home. Just let me bring my conditioner.

What’s your take on the new TSA guidelines? Click “comments” below and share!