By: Mary Fran Bontempo

MP900178843I’m ashamed to admit it, but I looked.

Despite my aversion to their vapidness, stupidity and general uselessness, after hearing the latest uproar about the latest episode in the land of Kardashian over-exposure, I just couldn’t help myself: I looked at the picture of Kim Kardashian’s bum.

Over-exposure it was.

In case you missed it, and I don’t know how you could have, last week, Kim Kardashian continued on her quest to destroy the world through her own bad taste and idiocy by posing for naked pictures. Again. If you recall, Kim’s initial exposure to fame (and yes, I will be using the word, “exposure” a lot as it’s all the Kardashians have going for them) was through a sex tape released around ten years ago. If I’m not mistaken, I think her mother, the matriarch of tastelessness, Kris Jenner, had more than a little something to do with the tape’s release and marketing. (Can you imagine? They should all be rounded up and marooned on an island somewhere, along with that nitwit Kanye West, Kim’s husband. But I digress….)

Anyway, last week, the New York based magazine, Paper, ran a spread (quite the apt description) of Kim Kardashian baring her famous behind for all the world to see. Like I said, again.

I tried to resist the madness, but after hearing about how the pictures were “breaking the internet,” as well as after years spent trying to figure out why young women know the name, “Kardashian,” but don’t know the names of the female members of the Supreme Court, I gave in.

In trying to describe what I saw, I decided upon the word, “prodigious,” which, according to, means, “extraordinary in size.” It also means “abnormal” and “monstrous.” Kim’s butt is both.

Prodigious also describes the entire Kardashian clan, especially the abnormal and monstrous definitions.

Which is pretty much how I felt after succumbing and doing exactly what those fools wanted me to do–become part of their conversation. Not only have I given in, but now they have me looking at porn, which is what those pictures are, without doubt.

The world needs an exorcism. And little North West (dear God, those lunatics Kim and Kanye actually named their daughter, North) needs a mother who conducts herself like a mother, not a shameless, high priced hooker.

But as long as people are willing to give in, the Kardashians will continue to rake in millions and millions of dollars to show us the worst of themselves, and by association, of ourselves.

Frankly, I’ve seen enough, which explains why I’m not putting in any links to the images. If the Kardashinas are intent on the destruction of the world, they’re going to have to accomplish it without help from me.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I feel like I need to shower. And figure out how to scrub my eyeballs.